Affirmations I Am Enough
This page has been inspired by the work of Marisa Peer and her affirmations I am enough, I am a good son or daughter, I am a good person.
In particular, I am focussing on the messages in this video in which she says the biggest disease affecting humanity is thinking “I’m Not Enough”. That’s a massive statement.
Marisa Peer
Marisa is a hypnotherapist who was named Best British Therapist by Men’s Health magazine. She is also listed in Tatler’s Guide to Britain’s 250 Best Doctors.
She has been invited on to many television and radio shows, including in Britain – Supersize vs. Superskinny, Celebrity Fit Club UK and in America – Celebrity Fit Club USA. She has also written a few best-sellers which I have listed at the end of this article.
She works with mainly celebrity A-listers and other successful professionals. They are just the people most of us would imagine that would think they had made it and they were enough.
Marissa tells the stories of a number of clients without mentioning names and how they change after they have worked with her.
As you can see, if you have watched the video, many of these people might be very successful in some areas of their lives but find other areas more problematic particularly regarding self-esteem. What Marissa found, was that often, their problems stemmed back to childhood where for some reason they judged themselves to not be enough for some person. Maybe it was a parent or the teacher or maybe one of their peers.
Our Children
Now you can imagine if this is a problem for celebrity A-listers who are successful it must also be an issue for some of our children.
Marisa doesn’t just talk about A-listers she also talks about her own family and the changes that she has made to help them. Listen to the bit about writing it on her daughter’s wall (12:12) Later, in the video, she talks about some of her daughter’s comments coming home from school and the importance of countering negative messages children may have picked up.
One of the main methods is to get them to write the words “I am enough” on a mirror. This sounds simple but seems to have worked well.
One person was talking about his son. He asked if he should write it on his son’s mirror. Marissa told him that this would just antagonise his son and he should write it in areas that were family areas, like on the fridge. Later he reported back that his son was feeling much happier. Not only that but also his wife was feeling better. There’s more to it than that but I’ll let you listen to the video for all the details. (The story stars at 14 minutes.)
So what could you do? Where could you put it? Do you think it would be helpful? Or do you think it would be a bit silly and wouldn’t make any difference? I’ve decided to try it out on my fridge and bathroom mirror.
Marisa has one photo in the video of a woman who has it tattooed on her hand! She says it changed her life!! Wow!! Now she, her husband and her children say it all the time. She can’t forget because of the tattoo and neither can they!
Make Praise Familiar
Marisa tells us that we are strangely more comfortable with what is familiar rather than what is unfamiliar. So, if we are familiar with praise then if somebody compliments us we can happily say “Thank you” but if praise is unfamiliar and somebody compliments us then we’re more likely to get embarrassed, shrug it off or deflect it on to somebody else. We might even add in criticism of ourselves. This is of particular concern because the major cause of depression is the critical and repetitive commentary many people use against themselves.
We don’t want our children to be those who feel more comfortable with criticism than praise.
Catch them being good.
You have probably heard it said you should catch children being good and praise them for it. In some cases it might be hard to find children being good. These may be the children who haven’t been likely to have experienced being praised as much and so it is even more important to try and find something to praise.
Maybe there is another environment where they are used to getting significant criticism.
Praise them even if they’ve just done something for a couple of seconds. They may have become used to attracting attention by bad behaviour. As time goes on they’ll get used to getting praised for doing something good. They will come to enjoy this type of positive interaction.
Sometimes we don’t praise children because we think well they’re pretty good so we’re always going to be praising them but they might think they’re not doing enough. They might not realise how much we already appreciate them.
Praise your child for being!
You don’t always have to wait for your child to actually do something. Why not just praise them for some aspect of who they are? Don’t forget they are on a journey.
You are a fabulous child.
I am proud that you are my son.
I am proud that you are my daughter.
We have a lovely family and you are an important part of it.
You’re a great kid and you’re going to grow up to be a great adult.
I love the way you take care of your brothers and sisters.
You hardly ever argue and when you do you make up quickly.
You are learning more and more, you must be paying attention at school.
You listen carefully when people are talking.
It is so relaxing being with you.
I feel happy just being with you.
What could you add? Please put your suggestions in the comments area below. I look forward to reading them.
Marisa Peer’s books
These books are targeted at an adult audience so I am suggesting you get them for yourself, if you are interested, rather than to “use” on your child. (I do get a small commission on these from Amazon if you buy one but it doesn’t affect the price you pay.)
Ultimate Confidence: The Secrets to Feeling Great About Yourself Every Day
This is the one I read and enjoyed so if you were just wanting to get one I’d go for this one. There is a link to a free hypnosis download available.
You Can Be Thin: The Ultimate Programme to End Dieting. Forever
There’s no diet in this book!!
You Can Be Younger: Use the power of your mind to look and feel 10 years younger in 10 simple steps
Sounds good!
Hi Julia,
This is one post jammed packed with very useful information. The thing I loved about this post is just how simple you put these points together.
As a dad, many times I have a hard time to praise my kids as they are.
I really like these sentences:
“You are a fabulous child.
I am proud that you are my son.
I am proud that you are my daughter.
We have a lovely family and you are an important part of it.
You’re a great kid and you’re going to grow up to be a great adult.
I love the way you take care of your brothers and sisters.”
Definitely, I will use them.
Thanks for sharing!
Maun
Thanks Maun for your comments!
Hopefully, your kids will soon be telling you what a great Dad you are – if they are not already doing so. (Get one of your friends to tell them to do so and then when they do, pretend to be amazed and say that is so nice they deserve an ice-cream or whatever.) Reward sometimes, other times just say it back to them!
This is a very helpful article for people with kids. I don’t have kids, but my brother can definitely benefit from this article; he has 12 months old. It is very helpful that you also included the examples you use to praise your child. I will pass this information to him. Thank you so much for sharing.
Thank you for your kind words.
I am sure this will improve your relationship with your brother, even if it is really good already!
All the best,
Julia
These are all great affirmations. I love that you mention catching kids being good. Kids can take scoldings to heart and make it bigger than it should be. Reaffirming their positive behavior is necessary to break down any thoughts that may be trying to convince them otherwise. Even adults need to hear praise often too.
You are so right Yemi! Thank you for your encouragement and timely reminder that adults need praise too!
Thank you for such an informative article. As I was reading on how to praise and appreciate children, I kept on reflecting on myself as a dad. I have four children and among them, I have a daughter who likes to seek everyone’s attention by doing funny things.
I hadn’t read this but I just began praising her after the school closed for December holiday a week ago. I praised her for accomplishing grade 5 successfully and performance. As I did that severally even in other areas of her life, I started to notice a great change positively in her behaviour.
Indeed there’s power in praising children!
This is a very good post and has so many truth in it.
Childs are very vulnerable for these kibd of bad thoughts, if it comes because their classroom mates, their friends, family, or just themselves, I will leave that aside, but the fact is that you need to support them in any way, because they could feel bad and sad and you end up with a child that is far from its potential, because his/her thoughts are blocking it.
I will share this post because it is a very important matter.
Thanks for sharing it with us!
One thing my mum doesn’t allow in her children’s lives is when people trying to abuse them with words. She knows quite well that those negative words will have negative impact in their lives, so she doesn’t like hearing them at all.Even the bible asked us to guard against every negative thoughts that comes into our mind, it could be from people but we have to resist them to protect out our mind from being infected.
Hi,
Good on your mum!!
She is right – children don’t need to hear any negative words!!
All the best!!
Julia
I AM a Healer.
in ALL Universes.
Healing Mind.
I AM Enough.
Rique
Thanks, Rique!
You are enough!!
All the best,
Julia
What a beautiful and informative post.
I use affirmations daily, and they are great tools for the subconscious mind.
I have 7 year olds twins, and often praise them – but this post made me reflect on if I praise them enough.
My favourite affirmations are these:
* I am proud that you are my son.
* I am proud that you are my daughter.
* We have a lovely family and you are an important part of it.
I will be using them all on my children, but these hit home for me.
The world is crazy and hectic place, and it’s easy to be lost in the negativity at times – so it’s more important then ever to praise our children.
Thanks for a wonderful and uplifting post.
Adam
Hi Adam,
I am glad to hear that you enjoyed the post and that your son and daughter are going to get even more praise!
Hopefully, you will find them praising each other, friends and you!
All the best!
Julia
Hi Julia,
I’ve been into affirmations for a looong time already and I do believe they hold a lot of power, that they can empower a person. I never heard about Marisa Peer though, so I really want to know a lot more about her! I wasn’t aware of the writings on the mirror, but of course it makes sense that when you surround yourself with positivity you also attract positivity!
Hi,
Marissa Peer is great. You can find her books on Amazon, and videos on YouTube.
All the best,
Julia